99 Problems 08/06/11

"Cold B.E.E.R.S"

Attendees: Cam, Ben, Michael

Price: The highs & the lows - $9 Tiger pint, $3 Tecate can

Location: 31 Johnston St between Smith and Wellington

Distance: 5 min walk

Obscurity: Very obscure. Quite dark and easy to walk past even with a large front window. Lucky we had a good tip off to find it!

Ambience: very keeeewl. A close, intimate atmosphere. Great light-to-sound ratio. Having a table filled with beer cans also has a certain "je ne sais quoi" to it. Adds to the hip underground vibe.

Character: Full of characters! The small room has a unique and personable character and creates social interactions. However the good use of space means it doesn't feel too cramped.

Decor: The nordic glacial mountain feature wall is a winner, straight out of a 70s National Geographic. Bare light globes have some extremely funky filaments. Besides, lamp shades are so 2010..

Comfort: A little close but this is all part of the charm. After a few beers you'll appreciate the forced intimacy between different groups.

Selection: Tiger on tap doesn't really fit the feel. Only 2 options on tap but a decent selection of bottles. Go the Tecate if you don't want to stick out. Also a good selection of wine and spirits.

Patrons: Very kewl but in a more subdued, Collingwood way. Some serious talent as well, in amongst some impressively ironic facial growth.
Staff: Enthusiastic and friendly, they look like they want to be there. Love her tattoos.

Outdoor: A covered laneway area with a forklift pallet doing duties as landscape decoration. A little too cold out tonight but a good simple area to hang out.

Amenities: Unisex toilets are a point of divided opinion amongst the B.E.E.R.S executives. Artwork in the toilets runs with the mountain scene. Good conversation starter for those waiting in line moments.

Specials: $3 Tecate cans!

Field notes: Guy on toilet door looks like Gollum according to Michael. Hipster tolerant people can expect a great time. Some chilled hip hop playing is a nice touch.

Memorable quotes: "An elephant's head? Just get some fucking tea lights!" BH (talking about the Carlton Club)

"I don't know if I was in there or not" BH

Arbitrary score: 80

After breaking through the indie-wanker crust you can have a great time. Very good local spot with a relaxed and comfortable atmosphere.